Surfing With Detachment

Today is an overcast day here in Boulder. My wife is quite sick. It's Father's Day and I spent half the day, cooking and cleaning. I feel weighted. But I read a great parable about a man who's horse runs away. All the villagers cry sorrow for him, lamenting his inability to pull his plow and grow food. But he says I don't know if this is good or bad or what will be the end result, all I know is that I lost a horse today. A day later, the horse returns with six others. The villagers praise his good fortune. He says I have more horses now, but who knows what will come of this. Riding one of the new horses, the man's son gets thrown off and breaks his leg. The villagers cry for his bad luck, the loss of his son's productivity for farm work. Again, the man says my son broke his leg, that's all I know. The next day the local government comes to the village to draft all the young men for a newly declared war effort, all but the man's son.

The concise delivery of the ups and downs of life in this parable and our inability to control life's circumstances is powerful. You know, as well as I, that what we can control is our reaction to our circumstances. Whether it's a fist through a wall, a scream, a cry, or a laugh of joy, where do we find ourselves in our reaction to life's circumstances? Or do we react in the hopes of finding ourselves?

I can feel sadness on this gloomy day, and yes, I do feel it, but there's also a part of me that feels that sadness like a weather pattern or ocean wave outside of myself. Reaction seems to be the modern state of the world today in the high exposure media world. Limbaugh's reaction. Palin's reaction. Obama's reaction. BP's reaction. We're more concerned with reaction than with the state of affairs, confusing the former for the latter. Thus, it's difficult to absorb the emotional weather of the times. It diminishes our power, lessens our perception of the world. How can we be a good people, causing so much destruction? Whether we hate the whining liberals or the raging conservatives or couldn't care less about any of the media babble, we still struggle with the state of the world, or maybe our taxes, our family, unemployment, debt, or general conflict on the road, at work, or at a restaurant.

But is there a way to fight our fight and feel our power and maintain detachment? I don't have the Buddhist or Hindu terms handy but I do know that passionate detachment is a form of self defense and offense that cultivates a more empowered life, where reaction is just the surf and our real power comes from our decision to ride the wave or crash headfirst. Of course, riding sounds like the most desirable option but you've got to practice for years as these are some big waves coming at us these days. So I challenge myself to get on the board and start practicing, right now. But what will happen when I fall? Will I get pissed and hate myself for trying? Or will I say, fuck it, and just get right back on the board? What about you?